Motheo ( (27 weeks))

So much has happened from the last time I wrote to you.
Our faith in God has been rigorously tested, we received bad reports, your life at some stage was in danger.
Your Mom (my wife) and me prayed and praised God your maker through out.

The support of your grand parents was awesome, our friends were there every step, our church was a pillar of strength.
We were in hospital for almost two weeks, I prayed even in my sleep, I said to God "you cannot lead me on for this long and abandon me half way" it wasn't like him, The psalmist says "God Is God and God God" he led the Israelites from captivity in Egypt to the promise land safely, he is not human, he doesn't renege on his word/promise, he had not changed his plans about you.

After you and your mom were discharged for hospital the role that Church played was humongous , they made it a point that she was fed for three weeks without her setting foot in her kitchen, they provided meals for us, for that I will for ever be grateful to Go Church, Pastor Paul Nyamuda, Brother Mike Manyuni and everyone at Church.

Auntie Lerato and Champ ( her Husband), Auntie Moriana ( Mmamorategi) ,Auntie Shibu ( Mma Ofentse) ,Uncle Machaba and his wife , Brother Mike and his wife all popped in to say a prayer and to see you and mommy , your granny ( comrade Winnie) was there every step, we shall forever be grateful to them for their support and their prayers.

Well I am writing to let you know of the favour that God has bestowed over your life son, I want you to know that you are an overcomer, that there is absolutely nothing you can't do.
I feel very honored that God trusted me and your Mom with your life, we shall out do ourselves at all times to raise you in his ways, we will draw from his word and rely on his wisdom.

I love you, the astronaut himself Motheo.

Missed meeting

Mr Motheo Nepo the astronaut himself, my dude apologies for missing our meeting scheduled 7nth November 2012 08h45 AM.

I had an emergency to attend to, I tried speaking to your mom about rescheduling she refused point blank!!
First signs of competition made clear, in her own words she said " tomorrow ke nna le ngwanaka fela".
Your mom is not comfortable driving in GP traffic but for you she was willing to do confront her fear, you are one lucky dude my dude!!

I am incredible your mom amazing and you are awesome, your mom kept me updated on my way to attend to the emergency I alluded to, she sent a photo and assured me she will have the meeting on DVD.

The Dr's report is that you are doing too great growing to be a big boy, all tests came back and you were given a clean bill of health, God has been good to us and we praise him forever.

We are at the midpoint of our pregnancy, it has been 20 beautiful weeks and we have 20 more beautiful weeks to go!!
I have officially started a countdown, I am thinking we start a family business say call it Mahlatse & Son? Nah!! Getting ahead of myself!!

Your mom has started writing and will post here soon, I love you, your mom loves you, we love you so much!!

We are scheduled for the last meeting of the year 2012 on the 7nth December 2012!!

It's a boy

The 9nth October 2012 was another scheduled meeting with my young man, Dr Roodt and my beautiful wife.

I have in the past weeks read a lot about where you are, how you should be and all.

I have been encouraging my wife, your mom to take her supplements, to ensure you get all the nutrients your little self needs.

We can feel you in mommy's tummy. Your movements are cute, you get mommy visiting the bathrooms quite often when you put pressure on her bladder, however when she kindly asks you to move you do, very cute, sometimes she calls me to come talk to you and like a good son you heed your old man's request.

My lilman I love you, so in the Doctor's room he dials your number and you play hide and seek and got me worried a little, he dials again and you pick up, damn!!

I look at your mom lying on the Bed and we both smile, you disappear and we laugh, like an astronaut you are untouchable bouncing up and down with joy at least I assume, when your fact finding mission is done we shall be inseparable.

Oh and the Dr says " do you want to know the sex?"and your mom beat me to a yes and he says graphically I can see the penis and the scrotum its a Boy!!!

I for a moment zoned out, thought I was dreaming, for the entire day like a kid with a lollipop in his hand I cared less about the world, I was so overjoyed!

We are scheduled for another call next month Mr Astronaut you!!!

From Mom and Dad, we love you so much!!

Second meeting

11 weeks it has been since you were craftily formed in your mother's womb.

The last time I saw you I could only see the heart beat and I was content, I left the doctor 's room a very excited man.

The 6th was way fun, the doctor found you in a very buoyant mood, like an astronaut you were floating, showing off your hands and legs.

We could also see your nose, your mother reckons it resembles hers, well your mother is beautiful her nose is a model one, if it was possible I would buy one that looks like hers.

Your heart beat measured at a good 161bpm and your height at 43,4 mm.

I have never prayed like I am praying now.
I love you, Mom does too, I will get her to write to you too.

I told your grandfather about your presence, he is excited and he sent a congratulatory text.

We are meeting again in 4 weeks time.
I am hoping you will be as joyous as yesterday.

First born

It's the second week since that great day I learnt about your coming.

The past weekend our friend Odwa organized us a surprise party to welcome us (newly weds) to Gauteng, it was great, we had fun, spoke and laughed a lot.

On the home front: I can't believe I get to watch your mom's tummy changing in shape and form, it excites me to know you are growing in there buddy.

I am still overwhelmed, excited and very grateful.
I am forever evaluating my life, auditing ,changing here and there positioning myself to be a great Dad.

I am applying myself differently at work, working smart as if you are watching.
I am gonna make you proud, I am already proud to know you are on your way.

Your mom, my wife: i can't wait for our fighting for her attention, oh! She calls me papi and you will too and I will call you papi.

So papi I will write again next Monday.
I am watching you!!

Men are meant to be leaders, manufactured to lead.

It is such a sorry site when you see a man lacking in purpose and vision.
He follows whoever seems to know where they are going.

On a more controversial note, have you seen the majority of born again Christian men?
It is a sorry site, pussy footing in all directions, like a brother was born with a blank brain and it's being filled as he goes.

I understand why there is a lack or dwindling numbers of men going to church, born again Christian men 's hand shakes?their hugs? I mean really was Jesus that feminine?

I feel for women married to some of the folks at church, like really!!
I mean a man who idolizes another man so much he wishes he was that man.

Ok!

My first born

When the news of your presence reached me on the 01/08/12 I found myself day dreaming about you.

I suddenly started thinking and doubting myself, asked myself if I was deserving of being a father, if I would make enough money to get you the best of everything, if I was wise enough to raise you in the ways of the Lord,

I have in the past wrote you letters, telling you how much I love you, you will have a chance to go through them someday, in case you only see this one, I love you, I love you and I love you.

The excitement is overwhelming me, I day dream, I smile at the slightest provocation.

Did I tell you I love you? Ok I love you, the greatest miracle that has ever happened to me, you are God's love in visual terms.

I am beaming from ear to ear, I am naming you Motheo or Thato .
You will play hockey professionally, be the greatest scientist ever maybe?

When we get to meet I will hug you!
When we get to meet I will kiss you!
When we get to meet I will pose with you!
When we get to meet I will say a prayer!
When we get to meet we will be joyous!
When we get to meet I will help you cry!

For now I wait for you,
For now I promise to be patient in my waiting
For now I am learning all I can about being a perfect dad.
For now I am praying for wisdom!

I spent last night praying in my sleep, with my hand on your Mom's tummy!

Your Mom is beautiful inside out, she is perfect, intelligent more than me!
You are in the perfect home I know.

I could write all day long, let me end here for now.
I love you, I love you, I love you!!

Tv in the early 90's.

Remember the time when all the kids on TV were speaking good English? some even twanging?
And all because they were adopted and raised by white families.
Some stayed with their biological moms emakitchini and went to the same school with umlungu's kids.

I would come back from school and sit in front of our black and white television set.
I watched with awe as kids my age waltzed their tongues over the Queen 's language with ease, at times I would imitate,
I would copy their clothing style, you have to imagine how difficult it would be to copy a clothing style of a 'coconut' being in the deep rural areas,
I would cut some of my clothes, sew up some to look the part.
I so much wanted to be adopted its not a joke.

When doing shopping in town with my grandfather i would be so nice to all the white women we saw or met,
Even if we never spoke I would just smile,
I think at that point I hated my mom for not working ko dikitchini.
I don't know if you get me, cause i would like you to, its not a joke,
I swear to you by my late handsome grandfather,

So i started preparing myself for adoption by reading my grandfather's Mail and Guardian, The Citizen and Sunday times.
I figured that if I spoke as well as my grandfather then I am as good as the kids on TV.
Its my story and I am selling it!!

Sometimes

When i am at odds with myself,
when my life fails to compute,
When i feel like selling this commodity called life,
When all i own and know does not make sense, i think of one man.
The  crazy man along the N1 walking purposely to nowhere,
The crazy man in my village,
The crazy man everywhere,

He talks to no one, amuses himself, seems happy to me.
His party instincts are never wrong.
Where there is a celebration of some sort he never misses his selfinvite,
And when he arrives he gets on with the programme of the day(being happy)  
He bothers no one but his body, his dancing is as genuine as that of a toddler,
He is boss, his opinion is the one that matters about him.
I have to be honest and say i envy the crazy man's life,
His obsession with happiness is what drives him daily,
He walks around the village looking for gatherings/celebrations of some sort to feed his happiness hunger.

His brain is very selective, it chooses happines thoughts, he chooses a life of an entertainer daily, his work lasts longer than most entertainers i know.
When i say i am crazy i literally mean i am in that state of happiness that is indespensable, that is negativity proofed.
The crazy man does not care what you think of his looks, dance styles,
He is so consumed with himself,
He enjoys his company hence you now and then catch him giggling to self,
He gossips with self, cracking now and then.
I sometimes really envy the crazy man'slife.

Suits

On a fashion note, I like to wear fitted clothes, except when I hit the gym or sleep.
A man must wear clothes not the other way around,
Some fellas send friends to buy them clothes, really?
Well take a look and tell me you don't think this is to die 4!!!!!!

Valentine's day

I baked these and could not wait to see my fiance munch on them,
she started on the left going right,
with every bite the excitement swelled even more in my heart,
Then I spoilt the whole thing by waking up,
Well all this was in a dream,
And it was on Valentine's day,
Can't blame a guy for dreaming.

The Irony

The irony of Julius S Malema 's utterings is that he can't quote himself:

For instance no one will kill for him
For instance the tjatjarag term he used came back to bite his big behind
For instance he referred to the former president as a dead snake, now who is laughing now?
For instance he likened himself to Mandela in his early years, Mandela did not enrich himself although his grandsons are on his behalf?lol
For instance he said Thabo wanted to manipulate the ANC constitution so he can have a third term, now he has manipulated the ANCYL's constitution so he can't be fired by those who pay his salary
For instance he wants the land to be reposessed and given to the natives for free, but he has bought two farms already

He however has one thing in Common with TM the former president, he understands the ANC position in the tripatite alliance, this is what the current president JZ
misses, he goes to bed with SACP and COSATU, instead of playing the referee between employees and employers he is seen to be siding with the employees, well this doesn't bode well with the investors.

By the time you read this blog JUJU o tla be a sepetse, he will keep walking.

Hope

It is a Wednesday night and i am sitting lazily on the couch, the very same spot i like sitting every night and just trying to take a breather from writing.  Whether wifey is home or not this is my spot. It is every Wednesday night that i anticipate watching the SA PSL matches, tv remote clinging and all,yes-to manipulate channels we are watching tonight. -

Wifey is preoccupied with her school work and she is putting final touches on her Zoology thesis, smarty pants for a wife i have, smarty -skirt rather.   So while I'm cruising with the tv remote control,i discover that its international week so no PSL games shown live tonight, what a bore. Well i enjoy watching soccer although at times i do not want to come clean for obvious reasons, like being judged by my model-c friends for not following rugby or even hockey?

Im busy channel hopping when out of the blue wifey asks me to tune to channel 130, understand the enormous amount of pressure i am under to say channel 130 so you know i am not watching from the welfare tv, no lol!   As it turns out channel 130 is Simunye, SABC1, and Khumbulekhaya the 'drama' has just started. Oh, with so much pride, wifey sings along to the sound track, this woman of mine doesn't hesitate to bring me up to speed, as if i care but LOVE as you know pays attention. She is so accustomed to the show to an extend that she knows how the stories (adventures as I call them) will unfold. You know what frustrates me is that,even when she insist that we watch this lifeless thing, she cannot seem to bring herself to watch when they break into tears,which is my favourite part, really mara! What is Khumbu without a tear or two..come on let them cry us a river instead.
 
Let us talk about Khumbulekhaya shall we...... i begin, ''no life is as hard as that of a black woman''. Well, the poverty cycle is simple really, everyone is looking for either their parents or relatives who are somewhere out there in the same poverty boat, however with hope you cannot dispel that maybe, just maybe things are better. What if your mom isn't making contact because she is having it easy wherever she is
, what if.  An unemployed 30 year old and father of two, weeping endlessly in search of his mother..."i want to find her and live with her..."....''I want to find her and know how it feels to have a mom'', moving right along sir.

The trend is very easy, women are very predictable, if your mother left you with your dad it means only one thing, she could not stand the poverty. Women will never leave a kid behind with a rich dad, never, not in this lifetime! They will take you and use you to extract money from your dad, simply put,she will pawn you.   If you were left 30 years ago it is really a big shame, because it means your mother, or that woman who gave birth to you, thought your dad was so useless and hopelesss, to not even afford to take a chance on the  R2.50 lottery bet. Like your dad you will possibly turn out a good for nothing,the maths,really?.   I have been watching Khumbu for quite some time, it is always someone hopeful of breaking away from the poverty cycle, by searching for a lost relative hoping to find them swimming in a pool of success. As you would know,it always ends on a sad note . When you find the lost member of the family, they deepen your poverty status. Poverty is just like that in its nature,it sucks you in and sucks you good,so good that the ripple effect is inevitable. "Re tla sokola le wena" is sung week in and week out. If i tracked down a long lost relative and found them poor i would disown them right there and then, no jokes! I'll be like i just wanted to know 'lf you were still alive', PEACE, i am sure you have heard the latter on Khumbu, lol, its poverty!!!

I think i know how it is like to grow without the other parent, infact i know how it is how to grow without both parents, but there comes a time in a MAN's life where he has to spear-head his mission, pursue his purpose and stand on his own.  Yes we acknowledge the absence and yes maybe your life could have been better but guess now that we are here, we will make the best of ''HERE''.